better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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