I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
