Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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