he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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