Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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