do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Send help, water and tortillas.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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