Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize