So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
cat food counts as protein by the way
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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