just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
