Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
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