I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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