even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
