this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize