She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I believe in your delicious
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
