if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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