Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
