hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
