i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
