so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My pussy is not your playground.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize