If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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