new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.