We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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