so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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