so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
