They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
porn star boner night. come get it.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
