dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
