I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
