Just cropdusted the office
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
