i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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