Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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