I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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