I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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