honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
