Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
