She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize