Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
