I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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