My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
