It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
