Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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