Texts From Last Night

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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  I think i sorta joined a cult last night

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  (308): I think i sorta joined a cult last night http://tfl.nu/1gad
  Replies (6) Good night (1990) Bad night (1368)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.

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  (410): Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight. http://tfl.nu/1lc5
  Replies (6) Good night (4581) Bad night (751)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.

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  (501): He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer. http://tfl.nu/ubeq
  Replies (31) Good night (3242) Bad night (1341)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents

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  (843): I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents http://tfl.nu/wxlb
  Replies (46) Good night (8963) Bad night (980)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone

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  (614): i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone http://tfl.nu/w81g
  Replies (25) Good night (6485) Bad night (819)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned

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  (607): Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned http://tfl.nu/r5xe
  Replies (6) Good night (1002) Bad night (4872)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  "Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Nope, his last birthday was.

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  (910): "Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right? (770): Nope, his last birthday was. http://tfl.nu/dk94
  Replies (5) Good night (2097) Bad night (626)
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  (650): View more from California

  He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups

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  (650): He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups http://tfl.nu/2ekp
  Replies (4) Good night (1523) Bad night (617)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.

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  (901): I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off. http://tfl.nu/oaek
  Replies (6) Good night (1438) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable

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  (562): We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable http://tfl.nu/eg4m
  Replies (3) Good night (1825) Bad night (509)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.

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  (514): Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night. http://tfl.nu/qzgt
  Replies (4) Good night (1212) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands

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  (845): Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands http://tfl.nu/8ta4
  Replies (6) Good night (1429) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.

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  (604): Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele. http://tfl.nu/5la0
  Replies (1) Good night (910) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!

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  (816): Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this! http://tfl.nu/4lfv
  Replies (1) Good night (621) Bad night (278)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.

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  (646): He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body. http://tfl.nu/dbfa
  Replies (2) Good night (740) Bad night (267)

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