I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
