He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
