We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize