i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
