yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
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Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
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You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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