Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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