I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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