remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
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