the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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