Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
